Not Today Sadness: The Ultimate Happy Playlist

Hello, you! It’s been a while… You should know that right now in my head after typing that, all I can think of is the opening of Britney’s big comeback song ‘Break the Ice’ where she says ‘it’s been a while… I know I shouldn’t have kept you waiting… But I’m here now’ because clearly, you’ve been waiting with baited breath for my monumental return like we all did for Britney’s post 2007 resurgence.  Anyway, it’s been a bloody rough month. In my last post I spoke about how I was bored of recovering a month after my surgery, HAHA – two months on… I’m still recovering. I don’t know why I thought a ‘three month recovery’ would mean a couple of weeks to actually recover from the surgical pain and then another few weeks of feeling tired, GOOD LORD, I was wrong. It’s two months on now and I’m just bloody knackered. I’ve genuinely had some of the worst days of my life since my last blog post, I’ve felt incredibly lost and I’ve really struggled – in a way I never really have before. My second surgery absolutely obliterated me, I have genuinely felt dead… Like the only thing living about… View Post

Bloody Believe in Yourself

Hello, you!   I’ve been recovering from surgery for what feels like a lifetime now… Really, it’s just over a month but it’s gone SO slowly and things have been further complicated by an infection and the heavy painkillers. ANYWAY, because it’s been so slow, I’ve barely been into uni. For loads of people, I imagine this would be like ‘yes, GET IN’ because they hate going to lectures, but I’m a self-confessed nerd and always have been, I love to learn and I love to work. My name is Sophie and I’m a workaholic, etc etc. So for me, missing uni is like a kid not being able to go on the swings (yes, an analogy THAT sad) and I’m really struggling with it.     One of the things that I’ve noticed the most throughout this period of illness is how much of a toll it’s taken on my confidence. Frankly, it’s been obliterated. Anyone who knows me will say I’m a very confident person, so for it to take a knock says A LOT. Lately, I’ve found myself asking ‘am I capable of doing this?’ ‘what if I can’t do it?’ ‘what if I don’t do well?’… View Post

‘Learn to Rest, Not to Quit’

Hello, you!   I am absolutely living by this marvellous Banksy quote at the minute – ‘If you get tired, learn to rest, not to quit’. It’s almost a month on from my surgery (you can read about it here) and as the pain is VERY gradually getting better, the exhaustion from everything that has happened is really starting to set in. Every Sunday I say to myself ‘I’m going to go into labs tomorrow’ and every Monday morning I’m unable to get out of bed, due to a combination of pain, painkillers and lack of sleep. It’s been very frustrating because I hate not being able to do anything and I’m going a bit stir crazy. Yesterday I said my famous sentence, that I was planning on going into uni on Monday, and my lovely boyfriend said ‘try not to get your hopes up because you always get disappointed’ – he said this in a kind way, don’t worry, not a ‘lol good luck with that one, love’ way! It really resonated with me because I need to let my body rest, just because I don’t go into university at the minute, doesn’t mean I’m quitting and giving up,… View Post

‘You Have to Laugh…’

Hello, you!   You know the phrase ‘you have to laugh otherwise you’d cry’, don’t you? If you didn’t, you do now! A friend of mine had a situation which epitomises this phrase, I’ve heard the story in great detail and she has very kindly allowed me to tell you as long as she stays anonymous… You’ll see why! I’m sharing it with you in the hope that it’ll make you laugh and sprinkle some funniness into your day, so on with the story… One day, my friend had rolled out of bed late in the morning and decided to go to the gym. She’s like me in that she’s REALLY not the gymming type, but off she went and good for her! After getting all hot and sweaty, she was more than ready to go home. She stopped off at a McDonald’s down the road (proudly sporting her gym gear) to order a drink and some chicken nuggets… The perfect post-exercise snack. Driving home, her normal route, everything was fine! She remembered that there were road works on the road that led into her estate but NO BOTHER, the road wasn’t closed so it was fine. As she approached,… View Post

Get Well Soon

Hello, you!   Those of you who follow me on Instagram or Twitter may know that I’ve been really unwell again – the pain I experienced in April/May time returned. This time, it clearly couldn’t be my appendix (as originally thought) as they had already removed it earlier this year – you can read about this here.  Over summer, I had twinges of the original pain – it was so distinctive – I assumed, and desperately hoped, that it was just scarring from the operation to remove my appendix. In early September, the pain started becoming more frequent, with a couple of twinges happening per day instead of over a couple of weeks – I went back to the doctor and he said to see how I went, book an appointment for three weeks time and review it then. Little did I know, in the space of those three weeks, I’d have had two more appointments with a new consultant AND a surgery. On the 15th September, my pain became so unbearable that I had to go to A&E, they refused to discharge me given how much morphine I needed so I stayed in for a couple of nights –… View Post